I was tinkering with my site yesterday and an old post got sent out which was quite an interesting development as I was unable to do the weekly reading yesterday. I’m guessing that it must have been relevant for someone and this is just the universe getting the message across 🙂
How was last week for you? Mine did end up being quite busy and I’m taking a couple of days to have some me time and space to gather up my energies.
This week promises to be a feeling week. It may be that your Mom is foremost on your mind or she is visiting or just that you miss her. A lot of times when I’m missing my mom, I tend to cook her recipes and there is something about those dishes that fills me up so deeply. You could try that or you could just call her. If she is on the other side of the veil then maybe you could light a candle for her because you are on her mind as much as she is on yours.
This week try and feel through things. If there is a decision to make or something that needs to be done, or maybe even an invite you have. It may be something you think you should do or maybe it makes sense rationally, take a moment here to connect with your feelings and then figure whether you actually want to do it. If you find it challenging to figure out your feelings, drop into your body and stay a moment or two and you will have your answer. Also, know that it’s okay to say no just because you don’t feel like it. You need not share that with the world but honour your feelings by acknowledging it to yourself.
Be gentle with yourself this week, emotions have depth and swimming around in the deep end can be tiring. Also because emotions are so fluid that one than lead to another or there can be an intermingling of a few. Sometimes sadness can lead to love and sometimes fear can be connected to joy. Observe your emotions this week and try to not shy away from what comes up for you.
Someone just asked me what I mean when I say ‘sit with it’. Sitting with something is firstly quite literally sitting down (not standing) and thinking about something that is making you feel something and observing the sensation in your body.
The element of water relates to our emotions and considering how much water we have in our body we can say we are pretty emotional beings. For some reason, we are conditioned to suppress our feelings, logic, reasoning and a stiff upper lip are what we are taught. It, in fact, makes so many people uncomfortable when others show their emotions.
To show your feelings is a pretty vulnerable process and it is one odd person whom you can be your emotional self but show you must else the ocean inside will overwhelm you. Have a safe place where you can talk about how you are feeling – this is important especially in the time we are in now. It is but natural to feel worried or anxious, cabin fever is a real thing and being cooped up can bring up all sorts of low feelings. And the retrograde doesn’t help either. It is also not okay to dismiss your feelings and convince yourself by false positivity (this positive thinking is another conditioning which should be reevaluated!).
The message today is that it is pretty important to look at your emotional self and pay attention to what is going on inside. The emotional play in your inner world you are feeling could be reflected in your outer world through aches and pains in your body, leaky taps in your house, internet issues, conflicts or even a rat showing up. Look into what is within and just sit with your emotions for a bit, if you can get a friend or a therapist to be with you while you sort through your emotional landscape, all the better. Do this for yourself today ❤
The worst lie we tell is ‘I’m fine’. We lie to others and to ourselves saying ‘it’s fine’ and then we start believing that lie. This is not about the response to a greeting but about the meaningful things in life.
If you got hurt by someone, you’re not fine, you are in pain. If you got passed over for a promotion, it’s not fine because a part of you is questioning your worth. We shy away from our feelings, discard and diminish them by saying this sentence and our spirit diminishes a little bit everytime we say it. Maybe you are scared or anxious or feeling helpless or hurt or something else. Whatever it is see that truth for yourself.
Today, or in future, pause a bit before you say I’m fine. Think about whether you are actually alright and whether it is actually okay with you. It may take a while to get used to it and the first response may be to say it. It’s okay to back track and say actually I’m not fine, I feel this way. Maybe even start with acknowledging to yourself before sharing with others.
Start with this truth today and see what surfaces for you.
It’s the end of the year and typically the December reading would be about endings and completion but it feels like a new beginning actually started about a week back. It has been an atypical year with all the fits and starts, the long pauses that end with a flurry of activity. It has been a really introspective year as well, almost like there was a force that pushed you to think about things without and look and see within. The push was important I see now because, for something new to be borne, some deep thought is essential. Most of my attention was on this year being the year of the Hanged Man, what I missed was that this year is the end of a decade and a new decade will start in a month. The turn of a decade is a pretty significant event and this one especially so because the turn will give us a master number year (more about this in the Jan reading :)). So, in a sense this has been a year of endings and the what I thought of as fits and starts…maybe some of them were simply small endings which needed to happen. How was this year for you? Did you notice the pauses? Did some closure happen for you?
The first message for December is to flip it upside down so the last month of the year is a month of new beginnings. If there is something that you thought you would start in the new year, consider starting it now in December or watch for some information or opportunity that will make it possible to start right away.
It may be that things get flipped upside down around you or that there is an opportunity for you to flip them around in your mind. It is a natural instinct of ours to run away from our fears or to struggle when we feel that we are sinking. Flipping it around will mean that standing up to what we fear and surrendering instead of struggling, both are opportunities for growth and of owning your personal power. In an upside-down world, we can look at destruction and say that something new is being born here. We can look at an ending and simply see it as change. We are able to see that the worst thing to happen is actually a blessing in disguise.
Flipping things can be magical and it is looking at the world through the eyes of a dreamer. Something that seemed interfering can be seen as care. It can be the same stuff but looked at with the dreamer’s eyes, it becomes completely different. We use this at work and for problem-solving all the time – think outside the box we say but what if we were outside the box all the time, how much more wonderful could regular life be. When I’m upside down, I’m right side up is a good mantra for December.
The second message for December is to dive into the depth of your emotions. The time for dipping your toes had passed and it is time to go in and experience the full gamut of emotions that you carry. For many of us, even as we learn to figure what we are feeling, we are at a loss of how to express it. Many times we try and express our emotions in a calm and gentle manner. These emotions are not meant to be expressed this way. Joy wants to shriek out from the rooftops, sadness demands tears and anger wants to hit out at someone. It doesn’t have to be with other people, you are self-sufficient enough to do these by yourself. A pillow is the most amazing companion when it comes to expressing emotions. You can throw it in the air in exuberance, you can snuggle with it for comfort and you can punch it in anger. Cultivate a healthy relationship with your trusty pillow consciously and it will serve you well.
Keep track of your emotions with respect to your body and to the moon as well. If it is moon time then respect that and take it easy for a few days. If the moon is full and you feel the urge to dance naked, do it. Our sexuality is deeply connected to our emotions. We cannot be or feel sexy and spontaneous if we don’t feel safe and that’s something to deep dive into. Our sexuality is not necessarily satisfied by having sex with someone, it is much more internal than that. It is the feeling of boldness within, of taking what we want without waiting for permission. It is important this month to explore this side of the yin (the yin side of man or woman), the sensual, sexual, spontaneous side.
The last message for December is that you have entered the magic zone, the zone where you have left who you were and not yet become who you are meant to be. This is a time for great shaping and moulding and the universe is doing its part and you can help by being aware of the shape you want to take. There is a new energy at play here, a childlike wonder at this new creation, and even the playfulness of a child. Let this child come out to play even when you are adulting. Keep the innocence of the child and the magic of creativity alive in all your endeavours because this will enable you to be who you want to be. Be kind to yourself as you go through this process and if you find yourself acting like a child at times don’t chastise yourself.
It’s a short reading this month because the rest of the cards I pulled out are more or less the same and this seems to be the main message for now.
The changeover for you has already begun and you are in this delicious space of becoming. There is an opportunity for you to reinvent yourself like never before. This divine gap between who you were and who you are becoming is a cause of celebration. The universe is already in celebration, be bold, be spontaneous, be weird and join in the reverie.
The Queen of cups reminds me of Quan Yin. She is someone who is loving and compassionate, warm and caring, intuitive and empathetic. She is the Queen of emotions and therefore has mastery of her emotions. Not over but of. When she appears in Tarot she signifies a woman who embodies these traits or she can be an aspect of the self that needs attention right now.
When we talk about her mastery of emotions it doesn’t mean that she controls her emotions, it means that she has learnt to understand her feelings and operates from an adult space, a space that is more responsive than reactive, a place of compassion, a place a love – for the self and the other.
To feel emotion is a blessing but a lot of times we try and suppress them because it feels like we may be overwhelmed by them. Sometimes there could be a traumatic experience in the past which makes us react in a high-strung way and then we oscillate between too much and too little emotion. To be able to float in the sea of emotion, to feel the depth without feeling like drowning, is mastery.
There is encouragement here to let yourself feel. Feel deeply up to the place that is comfortable. Understand that there will be some depths that you can safely traverse and then there are others where you may need help wading through. Knowing when to ask for help is mastery too. Somewhere in the middle of too little feeling and feeling too much is the best place to be and it is only your definition of what feels like too little or too much for you, it is not for others to decide.
This week expect that emotions will be on the surface and that there might be triggers to give you the cues to where you should be taking your attention. The moon is also lending its weight on the message by brimming over beautifully today.
Today and the next few days, pay attention to what emotions surface up for you. It may be that these feelings just need to be seen and acknowledged or it may be that there is more in-depth work that needs to be done here. See where this awareness leads you. Maybe even do a moon ritual if you are already conscious of what needs your attention.
I love the imagery in this card – a young girl frolicking in the water with a Dolphin, while the moonlight lights up the sky and water. The water and the moon relate to emotions and intuition and the dolphin asks that you take some time out to play. The young girl, on the cusp of womanhood, represents newness and freshness.
The message today is to be open to new ideas, new inspiration and even new emotions. There may an unexpectedness in the inspiration you receive, but receive you must. It may open up doors that you may not have imagined and set you off on an adventure you may not have foreseen. If the calling is of a creative nature – art, music or even a cooking class, the universe urges you to jump right in. There may be no rational reason to but just do it because your heart calls out for it. Also, don’t have any expectations from it – it may just be for the fun of it and nothing else. Sometimes when we do things for the love of them and the fun of them, it opens up other areas of our lives, be it work or relationships.
An activity like this can also bring up some emotions that you may be hesitant to acknowledge or show to the outside world. The card says that it’s okay to show these emotions. This side of you – the creative, emotional, intuitional side of you longs to be seen, by you and by others. Take the step to show this side, take a small step if you will but let the emotional, frolicking princess come out to play.
Let inspiration flow today, unexpected as it may be and even as you don’t understand it in your conscious mind.
Overall today will be a good day for you. Some things will fall into alignment naturally for you. It may be an alignment of thoughts or emotions, it could be a steadying of a vaguely wobbly feeling you’ve had, it could be spiritual alignment or a life path one.
The Star card stands for hope and faith and when these two emotions come into play there is trust in the universe which allows us to align to its pulse.
It may be a day when you are in touch with your feelings but they don’t make you feel off kilter, in fact, you find yourself quite grounded, more so than before. If you can, observe this, it will help you be more in touch with your inner world without losing touch with the outer. You’ll find that you really like and enjoy this version of you.
It is also a good day to shine so don’t shy away from anything today.
We all feel bound at times. Sometimes it’s the circumstances we find ourselves in, sometimes we feel that we have no choice, sometimes we are afraid to move because the devil you know is better than the unknown. We are certainly bound by the social conditioning we have received. No matter how our own families were, we were still influenced by society on how men should behave and how women should be. We all chafe at the restrictions that are placed on us, by others and most definitely by ourselves.
Even at home, for some reason we start taking sides. I remember being asked by people – who are you closer to? Mom or Dad? What an awful spot to a child in, isn’t it? Then we start to choose and there is loyalty to one parent which comes into play and that is bondage again.
The longing is to be free, to go out there and explore, to let go the burden we seem to constantly carry. To have someone else do what needs to be done (without supervision!). This is the lament most of us have – ‘somebody has to do it and if I don’t do it, it won’t get done’.
I half wish that this card was a magic wand which would just make this feeling disappear. But we get some advice instead and that’s not bad. Freedom is in the mind and before we can change anything in our outer world we need to make that shift in our inner landscape. In most cases the feeling of entrapment is more in our mind than anything else. There are certain circumstances that cannot be changed and yet there are others that can. The card asks that you examine your thoughts and make an effort to change them and there is a likelihood that the outer circumstance might change. We may not be able to change a situation but we can certainly change the way we feel about it. If you can’t do what you love, then it’s best to start loving what you do. The same goes for people as well.
What chafes is just what needs to be looked at. What is the stuff that we have put away in a box and are not willing to open? What parts of yourself have you chained so that you can fit it? What barriers have you created because you have been hurt in the past? What restrictions do you place on yourself because you are scared?
The card says, just look at it. Maybe a solution will present itself. Maybe you will realise that these restrictions are no longer applicable. Once you are aware of them, you can change how you feel about them.
We tend to think of anger as a destructive force and something to be ashamed of and something to be suppressed. Think of anger as the fire element within us. Fire can be destructive and can cause a lot of damage but it is also something that provides us with warmth and nourishing food.
Anger is an expression of passion for life and living. Anger helps us set healthy boundaries and can be a protective force. If we listen to our insides in time anger can be a good friend to us.
Use your anger to fuel your passion, to get that adrenaline pumping, to get things moving. Use your anger to understand yourself better and to figure out what is behind the anger. Use your anger to respect yourself and set the right boundaries. Use your anger to free yourself from where you feel bound. Use your anger like kindling to energise yourself. And maybe use the healing power of anger to burn off what doesn’t serve you.
If you were angry and are going through some self chastisement and guilt, let that go. You are only human and all of us feel angry and it is healthy to give into that anger every now and then. If it was uncontrolled then all you need to know is that there was so much suppressed that it needed to burst out. Learn from that and release in healthy doses in the future. You don’t need to confront anyone or shout at anyone, you just need to let it out – maybe on a pillow or a punching bag. Or maybe channel it in some productive activity.
Another message of abundance for this week- how awesome is that! How was last week for you? Did you notice what all happened? Was it a busy week? I sold a couple of paintings last week which is not something that happens all that often so am quite delighted to receive another abundance message.
The fish symbolizes fertility, creativity, good luck, and abundance. The fish itself symbolises the water element which is all about emotions and feelings (and all the other fish symbolism), and it represents the deeper awareness of the unconsciousness or higher self. Expect to have a spate of good luck and more of everything but do be aware of what this more is doing to you emotionally and spiritually.
If you love water or have an affinity with water creatures, then this message is amplified for you. It is time for you to allow your yin side to take the lead. This week, go with the flow, be creative, be receptive, ease up and enjoy what you do (or do what you enjoy) but also be aware of what comes up for you emotionally. You may think that a random tiff has nothing to do with your ability to receive but when things happen around the same time they are connected. A lot of us usually have something not so good happen when lots of good things are happening and we say ah well, can’t have everything or chalo, nazar nahi lage :D. These are not random occurrences, this is our capacity to receive and most of us have trouble receiving fully and till we are full.
The watch out message that comes with this card is related to what happens to you when good things happen? Observe yourself and your body. Too much water can be a deluge and it can cause feelings of overwhelm. Btw, I am sitting with a fractured finger so I definitely have some of that overwhelm happening. It also tells me how I react to good stuff happening. So watch out for the overwhelm or anything else that comes up for you. Mostly, it’s not about doing anything about it or feeling bad about yourself, just being aware of it makes it far easier.
The message from the third quarter moon is to find a deeper meaning and connection in the world around you. It is a time to take stock and to reflect on where you are, how you got here and where you want to go on from here.
Reflect and contemplate. Introspect and course correct if needed. Ask yourself – What do I need to do to nurture my dreams? What actions will make my desires manifest? How do I grow from where I am? What are the patterns and limitations I have broken through and what still need to be seen? What resources do I have and how can I best utilize them? One of the major shifts I had was when I started listing down the resources I had, at a time which was particularly tough.
Maybe this is an exercise you can do to propel yourself forward? Resources are the material, physical, emotional, mental and spiritual. Aside from the obvious education and support system, there are inner resources like resilience, inner strength, a positive outlook and as you write them down you will notice how much you have inherited from your parents and in addition to that how much you have inside you. There is our support staff and things like public transport which are such big ones. There are things and people who make us feel more inspired or just plain happy (I count Trevor Noah as my resource because he puts a smile on my face every time I watch him!). Write it all down and when you see how much you have behind you, taking the next step will be so easy.
Another thing to do is to clear some clutter in your house or even your life. We all have a closet that could do with a cleaning and we all have people who take up a lot of space and energy. Or there is always mental clutter of the things you mean to do but haven’t gotten around to it. Either decide to not go them or get them done so you are free.
There’s been something in the energy of the last few days so if you’ve not been sleeping well or have been having nightmares the past couple of days or just waking up tired, you’re not the only one. It seems that some worry or even some fears are surfacing and that needs to be seen.
When we sleep our conscious mind shuts off and our subconscious mind takes over, which means that all the stuff you are consciously trying not to think of or are repressing during the day gets to come out at night. There is no need to worry or stress – things are always worse in our heads than they are in real life – but do pay attention to the fact that the fear and anxiety exists and needs to be seen by you.
Sometimes we avoid looking at these feelings because they bring up incidents that were really traumatic. If that is the case then please choose to explore this with a professional. I do want to say that it will not be as bad as you expect it to be. That’s the message from the nine of swords – it’s just not as bad as your imgination is making it out to be.
Today’s message seems to be a spillover from yesterdays, which is to step back and look at things from a different perspective. It is possible that you are too close to the situation to be able to see clearly. Be the observer instead of being the involvee in whatever situation presents itself today or the situation that is on your mind.
Observing means taking a step back and it is your minds eye that needs to take the step back, however, if for some reason you are unable to, try a physical stepping back and that should open it up for you. Think of the situation while standing and then take a step (or two) back and see what comes up for you.
The other message from the card is to observe, pattern out, how you are in relation to the moon and the sky. The cycles of the moon have a direct impact on our emotions and on our physicality as well. As do the planets and stars. You don’t need to be ruled by them but having an awareness makes it easier I feel.
Mercury is in retrograde now and people, things, situations tend to be rather mercurial at this time. Your plans may go awry and so might your gadgets. You may regret what comes out of your mouth during the retrograde as mercury is the planet of communication. Try to not start something new, buy anything major or sign agreements during the retrograde. Having said that – I usually take portends like these with a pinch of salt. After all Mercury has a 67 day cycle around the sun and the planet is in retrograde practically half the year!!
If possible, take into account the retrograde, if not, then just go do your thing without giving it a second thought. Give people the benefit of doubt because the air is mercurial and definitely be kind to yourself and others.
If you find yourself echoing the footsteps of your ancestors, know that they are here to guide you into a new direction that is entirely yours.
There is so much that we do subconsciously that mirrors what our forefathers did, even though we are not in the same circumstances. The last thing they would want for us is to mirror their fate. There are patterns that many shamanistic traditions identify and systemic constellation therapy as well. For example, the grandchildren of refugees tend to move house/place every two years or so. If you have managed to join the forces which makes you move every two years, you know which pattern you have inherited. Many of us have grandparents who fled Pakistan to come to India or are from Kashmir and have had to leave their homeland (not by choice but by circumstance). If you have a desire to have a home but never really fit anywhere or find the right one, the longing can be to find the original home as our roots are there. Or if you feel lack, it maybe a fate you are carrying which is not yours (British India ensured that most of our forefathers felt lack – financial or even lack of self worth). Sometimes it manifests in the same or similar disease. Try and pattern for yourself, where the connections are.
Sometimes the subconscious makes us repeat patterns out of loyalty to our ancestors. There is this amazing video by Shavasti that details out these. He starts with ‘you were born into a story that is already being told‘, which itself is a mind altering statement. Have a look here and see if that clears some things for you.
If you have something that comes up for you while reading this, seek out a Shaman or go for a Constellation workshop.
Your ancestors want you to know that you don’t need to carry any baggage that is not yours. You have their blessings to live life to the fullest.
This card is for the someone or something that you long to be with again. Those that we love are always in our hearts but sometimes we long for the physical connection.
It is said that when we sleep our soul goes about galavanting to many realms, to the past and to the future, to the higher and the lower realms. The soul decides where it wants to go but we can nudge it along to where we want to go as well. Before sleeping tonight you can ask for your astral self to go meet your loved one and while you sleep you can be with the person. You may not remember the meeting but you will wake up with a feeling of wellness. Plus you can always ask for a sign from the universe to confirm if it did happen.
This traveling need not just be with people you know. You can also give intent to travel to higher realms and/or to meet Angels, Gods and masters. Nightmares usually means you’ve been traveling to the lower realms and you can ask the soul to move to the lighter ones. If you feel like you’ve had a bad couple of nights, you can give an intent to sleep deeply and wake refreshed.
I’m off for a workshop so no readings from me till Monday. It is the full moon tonight though and I’ll try and put up a ritual today, if possible. Today’s moon is called the snow moon or the chaste moon and a cleasing ritual would be ideal. If you have any thoughts / ideas lemme know.